Words That Hurt

I absolutely LOVE this blog post I ran across today!! This post was written by John C. McGinley, an actor who is also an ambassador for Special Olympics. Click the link (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/john-c-mcginley/what-really-happens-when-you-use-the-r-word_b_4896444.html) and please, please, please go read it. Don't worry, I will wait...
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So there I was (don't worry, this is not the beginning of a great redneck story--this time!), scanning through my news feed on Facebook, and

BOOM,there is was in all of its glory. Thank you Autism with a Side of Fries (another good blog I follow, check it out sometime)!! And then I was inspired to write about this subject. For those of you who didn't go read the article (seriously, go read it!!! Here is the link.), it is about the infamous "R-word". And by "R-word", I mean any use of the word "retarded" or "retard" in any of its forms, also including the suffix "-tard". I would also like to include the use of terms such as "the short bus" and all that entails when used in a derogatory fashion.

Now, the thing is, I know most people who use this language do not mean to verbally harm anyone. I know plenty of people who use this terminology, and I know they really don't mean any harm by it. They're just trying to be funny or silly. I've even used "retard", and called people "retarded", and said something that my friends were doing was "retarded".  I even had a T-shirt (from my uber-awesome T-shirt collection, which I used to pride myself on in my youth) that said something to the effect of 'you rode the short bus didn't you?'. Well, fast forward to now, and I have JB, who, starting next year, will be riding the short bus to school. In the words of Homer Simpson, DOH!!

What a wake-up call! I wouldn't want anyone saying that in a derogatory fashion around my son, and I sure don't want anyone referring to him as a "retard". He is not mentally retarded. He is developmentally delayed. I really can't state it in a better way than the article did; it was so eloquently written and right on point. He said it so well!! Thank you John C. McGinley! I hope your post goes viral. It deserves a TON of attention! Please share it with your friends. With the autism numbers rising (and the number of special-needs people in general), we are all going to be affected in one way or another very soon. Think about that world where 1 in 50 people has some form of autism. Think of how many people you will be offending then if you're making fun of the short bus or you're calling someone a "retard".  Please think about what you're really saying next time you use the "R-word".


Check out the website http://www.r-word.org/ to learn more about the "Spread the Word to End the Word" campaign and take the pledge to never use the "R-word". This is a great cause! Please help by spreading awareness!

Interesting Facts About Our Day-to-Day Happenings

I was sitting here on this cold, rainy day thinking that since I was stuck inside, I should write a blog post. But then I have this problem all the time of not knowing what to write about. So, I read up on some of the autism blogs that I follow, and I saw that a few of those bloggers have at least one post about some interesting facts of their everyday lives. So I thought I would do my own in hopes that some of you would like to know why we do certain things and the reasoning behind those things. Hope y'all enjoy!


1. We let JB bounce. On anything that can be bounced on. We have a big trampoline outside, but we also have a small exercise trampoline in his room. We also have a large ball that he can sit on and bounce on. But he also will bounce on the furniture and the beds. We try to limit the furniture and bed bouncing by re-directing him to something appropriate to bounce on, but honestly, if its helping him calm down, I'm all for it.

2. We have to lock up the food. Most people who have kids are able to regulate and watch what their child eats. Not us. JB will eat anything. And I mean anything. Literally. Including digging in the garbage for some half-eaten piece of scrumptiousness. The garbage thing doesn't happen often--thankfully--so we haven't had to come up with a way to lock that up--yet. But we do have a bike chain on the refrigerator, and we turned a large gun cabinet with locking double doors into a pantry. Its awesome! I keep everything that he might possibly want in the cabinet. The veggies are apparently safe on the open shelves. *smile*

3. We have alarms on the doors. There was a time not too long ago that JB decided to go for a walk. Even since that day, we have had some sort of lock and alarm system on the door. These days, we have a loud 'ding-dong'-type alarm that goes off when you open the door. It uses batteries and was super easy to install. Previously, we have used things like jingle bells on the door to let us know if it was opened. We also had a hasp lock on the very top of the door that we put a pin through and at one point we even used a pad lock with it. Be creative if you have to folks. You may get laughed at by some for being a redneck (I know from experience), but at least your child is safe.

4. JB wears hearing protection muffs a lot, especially in public. If you see JB wearing his very large red and black hearing protection muffs, its because there is just too much going on for him to function. He gets very overwhelmed by large crowds and noisy places. So these help to block out a lot of the background noise. And yes, they are actual shooting muffs, made for hearing protection while shooting. We happened to have these (because we shoot a lot), and one day we discovered they helped him. So they are now his.

5. We may have to remove JB from overwhelming situations. Sometimes we are out somewhere and JB just has a hard time being there. These are usually places where you are expected to sit still and be quiet. Awards assemblies, church services, weddings, anything like that. And usually when we have to take him outside, its not because he is mad or angry. Its because he is happy and he gets very excited and starts making all of his 'happy noises'. Most people are considerate and tell me not to worry about his noises, but I just believe that its considerate of me to remove the noisy child and let everyone else enjoy whatever is going on.

6. We have to set a timer for computer time. If we didn't, JB would never do anything else. EVER. He must believe YouTube exisits solely for his enjoyment. There is a constant stream of Sesame Street and other PBS shows on going on over here during his computer time. This one is especially annoying when heard over and over and OVER! So to stop all of the "overs and overs" we decided that we would try a timer. And it works beautifully!


Well, that's all I can think of at the moment, but if anyone has questions, post them in the comments and I'll be happy to answer them!

The Great Outdoors

As I sit here in the 'grocery getter' waiting to pick up my babies (and yes, I started typing this out with the teeny-tiny buttons on my phone--because I was INSPIRED, OK?!) , I am thinking on opportunities for our kiddos to learn about the great outdoors. I want my kids to carry on hunting and fishing, camping, and enjoying everything that the outside world has to offer. I grew up doing all of those things, and I fully believe that its my responsibility as a parent to figure out a way to make those things interesting for my kids. And not just for my girls, but for JB too. And so I have to figure out how to relate this world to a boy with autism. Grrrreeeeeeeaaat. But hey, I am determined.

JB at fishing event 

So I have decided that this year I will be more committed to getting the kids up out of the house and getting them active outside. We have always been a fan of playing outside vs. video games and sitting in front of the TV, so this has not really been that difficult. Its the rest that I am stressing about. I am worried about teaching him how to fish. We went to a fishing event for people with special needs a few weeks back, and he enjoyed himself (well, the fishing part. The rest is a whole other story for another time *smile*). But that was a totally controlled environment, where the tanks were stocked, and you could see all the fish going on about their business, and I really think that's the main reason he enjoyed himself so much. He thought the fish were having so much fun swimming around that he really thought he should get in there and swim around with him. I didn't. We fought. I won. For once. YAY MOM!!! *smile*. But the point is, he had a good time.

JB camping at Uncle Bubba's

I am scared to take him camping. What happens if he feels like going for a walk in the middle of the night?? There are no security features like door alarms and window locks on any tents I've ever seen. I'll be riggin' that tent like a crazy person trying to keep him inside! But we've done it before. <---See this pic? This was taken while we were camping with some of Butch's family. We had such a good time with the family, and there were no phones going off, no conversations competing with the TV, and no crazy video games. It was soo nice, and that's why I want to continue doing this. It's totally worth it.

And then we get into the scary world of hunting. No, I don't mean hunting is scary in itself. I mean scary as in teaching a kid how to use a weapon--an AUTISTIC kid. And before I get a bunch of y'all sounding off about kids and weapons let me just tell you this: I have known how to uses weapons my whole life. I can't even remember not knowing how to shoot. Or not knowing how to use a knife. This was ingrained in me from the very beginning. there was no "put the guns aways, the kids are in the room". At our house, it was

Jenna shooting her BB gun

"let me show you how to use these properly so that you don't hurt yourself or someone else". And here in my own home, with my own family, that's how its been from the beginning. I fully believe that if you want to have responsible kids, you have to teach them how to be responsible. You can't hide something away and expect a kid not to be curious. What kid do you know that's not curious? So, instead of hiding, teach. Model good behavior with guns and other weapons, and most likely, you won't have to be scared of your kids using them. But how do I relate that to a kid with Autism?? I am still searching for that answer.

So now, my project is to teach JB how to use something. Whether its a bb gun or a bow and arrow or a fishing pole, I am determined to find something this boy can do. I want JB to find something he likes to do. The girls have softball and other things that interest them, but JB has nothing yet. Team sports are not something he can do right now. I want to give him something to do. I hope I can accomplish this! I want to share those moments with my son.

Please feel free to comment with any ideas you may have (I need HELP!! hehehe)!! I'd love to hear what others are doing--or if anyone else is a crazy as I am and is trying to do the same thing!